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Victim of domestic violence

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ihatehim
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Victim of domestic violence

Post by ihatehim » Fri Mar 13, 2020 3:41 pm

Hi, I have been a silent reader on this forum for a long time, however, my situation is getting more complicated that is why I hope I could get support and different views from you guys. Thanks in advance.

Could you please spend a few moments to read my case and see if there is any possibility for me to stay in the UK under domestic violence ground?

My husband is a lecturer at University. I am working fulltime with a minimum salary.

We got married in my country in 2016. I came to the UK under a tier 2 dependent visa in 2017 then switched to a spouse visa in October 2019. My husband obtained his ILR in 2018 and got a British passport in 2019.

From the 1st 3 months, I entered the UK, my husband was controlling me. He asked me to do what he wanted me to look at my cousin's pictures when we had sex. I refused him a few times. He kept my bank card and asked me to look for another man, he asked me to move out of the house and even made for me the profile on a dating website. He was not happy with my body so few times asked me to do boob surgery so it would be pleased more with sex. He told me that I made him get married to me so I had to serve and listened to him. He didn't allow me to be friends with people he didn't like.

After 3 months of our relationship, I could not stand any more so I decided to move out. I can't go back to my country as it is the shame for my family, even now my parents still don't know the issues between me and him. As soon as I moved out he tried to chase me back. He believed that if a couple had problems they should fix it by having sex. He asked me to see him at a flat we used to live together. He pushed me to have sex with him even I said no.

During this period he still visited me regularly at my rented accommodation. Few times I didn't want to use morning-after pill but he made sure I took them. He seemed to get nicer and told me to buy a house so I asked my parents for money.

2018 we bought the house together thank to my parents support and my husband idea. Since he moved in, he started controlling me, who I can be friends with, hide my swimsuit so I couldn't go swimming, what could I eat, what to wear.

Since September 2019 I have been suffering from lots of headaches and lack of sleep and I have been going to the GP and talked to them a bit about what was happening at home.

October 2019, I got the phone call from a friend who warned me about my husband. He had been flirting with a lot of girls from my country. I had arguments with him that day when he was on the way to the airport to the conference.

When he was back in the UK, I checked his phone and found out that he had been sleeping and flirting around with many women. He even messaged the students and asked for their pictures. He also went to my Facebook and added friends with my friends and my cousin and flirted with them.

I didn't tell him that I checked his phone but I had arguments with him. I asked him to get out of the house. He was angry and pushed me to have sex with him.

I was very upset after that day. I asked him to get out of the house for a few months because I was stressed and getting a headache and losing weight. He agreed but still visited the house and checked on me to see what I'm doing and eating. He parked a car in front of the house every day and message me all the time.

Few times he still got into the bedroom to try to sleep with me. I couldn't stand it so I decided to change the lock of the bedroom door. When he found out he was angry and hit me by the belt. I was so scared and upset so the next day I decided to talk to my manager at work. He gave me a few charity numbers to ring.

They referred me to get support with mental health issues. I told her about his behavior with me, with other women and students. She said because his job was in a position of trust so her supervisor decided to reveal my case with the police. But if I didn't want to go further I didn't need to.

The police came to my house and interviewed me. They helped me to change the lock on the front door to stop him from entering the house. I told the police that I did not want to proceed with the rape case and they were ok with that. However, last week they gave me a call and told me that they invited him for an interview about my rape case and the student case. they interviewed him last week and he denied all, the police also told me there was no further investigation, but he was not allowed to go anywhere near me. I was shocked because I did not expect my husband to know that I reported him or I even did not want to go further. Now, they have left me with no choice rather than going ahead with the domestic violence case.

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zimba
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Re: Victim of domestic violence

Post by zimba » Fri Mar 13, 2020 4:13 pm

Sorry to hear your story. The allegations against your husband are very serious, I hope you are seeking the right advice from the authorities. I advise that you try to stay in a safe refuge rather than your place which is a known location to reduce any risk of retaliation from your husband. Seek the help of charities and stay safe.

As you are under the spouse visa, you will be able to apply under domestic violence route SET(DV). If you have no access to money, you can apply for a different route that grants temporary permission to stay that includes access to public funds. Otherwise, you better apply under SET(DV) and also ask for fee waiver.

You can read the guide on domestic violence application here: https://assets.publishing.service.gov.u ... ce-v14.pdf
Here is also a link to good article on immigration matters regarding domestic violence from FreeMovement.org: https://www.freemovement.org.uk/domesti ... ion-route/
Advice is given based on my personal research and experience only. Do NOT contact me via private message for immigration advice

furry23
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Posts: 21
Joined: Wed Mar 25, 2020 11:12 pm

Re: Victim of domestic violence

Post by furry23 » Mon May 11, 2020 1:58 pm

Hello have you applied for the domestic violence application ?

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