Difficult EU spouse please advice

Hi all thanks for all your help, and hoping you can advise me like u did be4, am on my 2nd residence card valid till 2018, but having issues in the marriage me and EU partner haven't spoken in over 3 months and I have just found out he's been sacked from work (i thought he was on holiday), anyway its such a difficult marriage, am depressed so was thinking its healthy for us to separate but what happens to my status then? we have two kids, 3 and 7 both EU citizens, if i go for divorce would i have to leave the country? or can i make any application? ive been here since 2005 but we've been married for 7 years. now that we are not talking i dont think he's bothered what happens to me, please kindly advise, many thanks.

Go for the divorce. Get ror or infact pr. Only gurus can clearify if u can go for pr but definitely divorce followed by ror. You are safe

too old wrote:Go for the divorce. Get ror or infact pr. Only gurus can clearify if u can go for pr but definitely divorce followed by ror. You are safe

Thanks for writing back; appreciate, i thought EU spouse has to be working for me to qualify for ROR i desperately need a way out, its constantly having to worry abt him messing up at work, (somehow i knew he'd be dismissed) and that has been stressful. i hope there's a way for me.

Sometimes there are difficulties in marriage. It doesn't need to end in a divorce. Do what you feel is best for you and the children.

If your husband has worked in the UK for 5 continuous years (even before you got married), then he has PR status and is not required to work anymore in order for you to qualify under the EEA Regulations.

Jambo wrote:Sometimes there are difficulties in marriage. It doesn't need to end in a divorce. Do what you feel is best for you and the children.

If your husband has worked in the UK for 5 continuous years (even before you got married), then he has PR status and is not required to work anymore in order for you to qualify under the EEA Regulations.

Thx Jambo i know and am trying to keep together but i think sometimes its best to be away from each other, ive tried but he wont even go for counselling its tough when your stay/status depends on someone who 'really doesn't care' and no he hasn't worked continuously reason i re-applied for a 2nd residence card. I heard thru his friend's wife that he was on holiday but was shocked to find dismissal letter today, thanks again.

Are you able to apply for PR confirmation for yourself if you qualify? Getting your status confirmed will be reassuring and may bring some relief to any anxiety you may be experiencing. If possible, also try to re-engage with your spouse again and see if you both can dialogue and agree on a constructive path forward for you and the kids.

Marriage can be challenging and though the finality of divorce might be tempting, it may not be the right solution.

Plum70 wrote:Are you able to apply for PR confirmation for yourself if you qualify? Getting your status confirmed will be reassuring and may bring some relief to any anxiety you may be experiencing. If possible, also try to re-engage with your spouse again and see if you both can dialogue and agree on a constructive path forward for you and the kids.

Marriage can be challenging and though the finality of divorce might be tempting, it may not be the right solution.

Thanks plum70 for your kind words not sure i can apply for PR on my own without him, but like you've said that would ease the anxiety . There was an incident 4 moths ago that forced me to call the police so since then we haven't talked, despite me trying to reach out, thats what's really difficult, i don't really want divorce but......... Thanks again

lianmu wrote:Thanks plum70 for your kind words not sure i can apply for PR on my own without him, but like you've said that would ease the anxiety . There was an incident 4 moths ago that forced me to call the police so since then we haven't talked, despite me trying to reach out, thats what's really difficult, i don't really want divorce but......... Thanks again

Are you both still living together? Is there any way that you can obtain his documents (passport/ID card, proof of exercising treaty rights for 5 continuous years e.g. payslips, employment contract, self-employment tax records), certify them and send the certified copies along with your original docs and PR application? It's worth a try! You can also include a cover letter explaining the difficult situation you're in at present which has resulted in your husband's non-cooperation. He doesn't have to have obtained PR confirmation - provided that he has automatically acquired it in compliance with the EU Regs. - for you to get yours.

The best solution will emerge in time. Stay positive, safe and keep the lines of communication open.

Thks Plum70 yea we are still living together but biggest prob is he has not continuously exercised treaty rights, reason i re-applied for a residence card. I've tried reaching out to him so we can move on but he's not interested its depressing that's why am wondering in the event that we divorce what happens to my status? Thanks again

lianmu wrote:Thks Plum70 yea we are still living together but biggest prob is he has not continuously exercised treaty rights, reason i re-applied for a residence card. I've tried reaching out to him so we can move on but he's not interested its depressing that's why am wondering in the event that we divorce what happens to my status? Thanks again

In the event of a divorce you can apply to retain your rights of residence. This is possible because you have been married and have lived together for more than 3 years. Once you have retained your rights of residence - as you say that you do not qualify for PR - then the UKBA will issue you with yet another residence card which will be valid for 5 years. You will then be able to reside in the UK totally independent of your spouse but will need to be exercising treaty rights in some capacity to maintain your rights of residence and attain PR thereafter.

Best wishes.

You have many options.

1) If you have been married for more than 5 year, and you can show that he exercised treaty rights for a continuous period of five years, then you may be able to acquire the right of Permanent Residence.

2) If there has been breaks over this 5 years period, then you can only qualify for retention of residence, however this will be dependent on whether or not you can show that your husband was exercising treaty rights at the time of divorce.

3) If the above don't apply, you may still be able to secure derivative right of residence, if the children are European citizens, and you are their primary carer, or they are in full time education, and their father has worked in the UK in the past, either before or after their birth. The problem with DRC is that it does not lead to Permanent Right of Residence. Although you may be able to qualify under 10 years rule at a later stage.

Hi Obie thanks for yr help, am still hoping i don't end up with divorce so trying my best but sometimes i guess one has to accept ,i don't think hubby really cares anymore, so i'll probably go for retaining my stay, our first son goes to fulltime school, so fingers crossed that goes through when i do go for it. Thanks again for taking time to respond.

hi obie and plum hope you are both well, need your advice again, u know i feel emotionally abused (relationship seriously broken down its affecting kids, i cannot be a proper mum to my boys bse of it, as in he over looks me, so am planning to leave) what are my options? my friends say go to the council but dont think am entitled to any help, do i see a solicitor bse i dont think it'll be amicable. AM so confused dont even know where to start but i really need to leave him its not healthy for either of us. i work part time (20hrs) and he works full time.

Hi all, hope everyone is well, just a quick question, hubby is threatening to call home office and tell them our marriage is a sham(we having issues......again), what would happen in that case? BTW Its a genuine marriage with two children, would then cancel my visa? Spoke to solicitor yesterday about me returning home(africa) with kids, she said that will not be possible especially if hubby does not consent to it and they'll put into consideration that my 8-year-old who was born here is kind of settled, please advise or anyone with experience, many thanks.

You should qualify not only for a right of residence, but also a Permanent residence.

Not sure what your lawyer is waiting for.

Thanks Obie for yr quick response, lawyer wasnt really helpful, i'm gonna change, we are not divorced yet but i feel thats the best for me and the children and hubby too. do you think getting divorce should be my first step? hubby threatens "we'll never hear from him again after the marriage ends" must i have divorce cert be4 applying for ROR? many tx again

You are eligible to apply for Divorce, whether or not your marriage had lasted for 3 years, as you have a child by him.

At the very least, i believe you have a right of residence on the basis of the children is school.

I hope you do find a better rep.

Which part of the UK are you based?

Am in London (west london), many thanks will try that, two children 8, 4-year-olds. many thanks again

Are these children by the European guy?

Yes he's their father both kids have german nationality like he does.

Why is he acting so stupidly.

As i advised you last year, you have number of options, not sure why your lawyer has been unable to identify them.

Were the kids born in the UK.

i know.... its so childish but i've tried my best but things are not working, tx for yr advice i'll look for another lawyer, yes both kids were born here., He claims "ive used him to get status in this country" told him i have not and was willing to go back home, he's been to my country so can always visit his children if interested. Actually reason i've been holding on is bse of the kids (both boys), keep telling myself they need their father but its so hard for me. Now apparently i cannot just take the kids