marriage ....:(

honey123 · Post by **honey123** » Tue Jul 03, 2007 2:35 pm

he is 24

honey123 · Post by **honey123** » Tue Jul 03, 2007 4:37 pm

ok ill find all this out also the home office told him to come back on friday !

OL7MAX · Post by **OL7MAX** » Wed Jul 04, 2007 1:29 pm

<deleted>
Reason: Error in forum database caused a double post

OL7MAX · Post by **OL7MAX** » Wed Jul 04, 2007 1:29 pm

An asylum seeker who is granted asylum is no longer an asylum seeker. So, I'll venture that his application is still outstanding and his "status" is still "asylum seeker". That may put a small spoke in jes2jes's suggestion. If the boyfriend believes his country is too dangerous to live in that kind of excludes him taking a voluntary trip back without blowing the whole basis for his asylum application.

but as far as i no, he is on weekly benefits and the government are also paying for his housing

As far as you know (please read this! A level English, you say?), he is unable to support himself and, by your own admission, you are unable to support either of you. Do realise what you are asking of the British government and what disincentives they have to concede your application. You are effectively saying that because you are British the UK taxpayer should pick up the tab to support you and whomever you happen to fancy at this moment in time, even if they are not entitled to live here (let alone draw benefits). No, that's not how everyone here would see it - we may believe you genuinely love this man and will spend the rest of your life with him and that both of you will start earning big money and start making big tax contributions - but the Home Office may not share that optimism. And it's their opinion, really, that you need to sway.

My opinion: I don't see any reason to get married apart from youthful impatience. There doesn't seem to be an immigration advantage. You wanting to live together, share a life, have children etc., has nothing to do with marriage. You can do all of that right now (rightly or wrongly, this country treats girls like you as adults even though you aren't old enough to vote). If and when his asylum application is completed you can reassess your situation and, if you are still with him, you can consider jes2jes's suggestions.

stedman · Post by **stedman** » Wed Jul 04, 2007 1:44 pm

How is an asylum seeker able to claim income support and get paid housing benefit? He can't be on jobseeker's allowance as he isn't allowed to work, and he can't be on incapacity benefit without NI contributions.. so my guess is that he's a refugee, not an asylum seeker.

honey123 · Post by **honey123** » Wed Jul 04, 2007 5:33 pm

once again you have opened up so many more questions for me but ill be confirming all this information his status etc with you shortly
can people please stop commenting and critising my english, i mean for goodness sake im trying to be as formal as i can and as clear as possible. and lastly you have insulted my relgion because in my religion it is forbidden to cohabitate, hence the reason of marriage, and the many other reasons are alike other people, joint commitment .. etc. so please dont add your personal views of how i should run my love life as the topic here is him not me and why cant i just date him etc.

OL7MAX · Post by **OL7MAX** » Wed Jul 04, 2007 7:02 pm

i mean for goodness sake im trying to be as formal as i can and as clear as possible

I refuse to believe that someone studying for an A level in English can't spell English with a capital "E", doesn't use a single apostrophe and can cram in excess of 20 mistakes into her short last post when she is being formal and clear! Why do you think we all bother to start sentences with capital letters? Ans: Because it makes it easier for people to read what we've written. It's not that you don't know; it's that you can't be bothered.

Marrying him won't wave a magic wand over his immigration status. Marry him for background reasons of your religious convictions etc., but be prepared that he may not succeed in his application and may have to return home. Your options then would be to try for him to apply from there, return with him and live with him while he is trying, make a life there if he never succeeds, or leave him and return to the UK. Sure, in your religion you marry for life and all that... but this is an immigration forum so let's stick to discussing your options in relation to his immigration problem. I'm sure John and others would be happy to advance further advice on the details you are providing later.

If all else fails you could try moving to another EC country to exercise your "treaty rights". You may then be able to sponsor your non-EEA spouse. Once settled there it would be possible for both of you to return to the UK. That's all more than a bit tricky, takes some money and time and some good legal advice.

why cant i just date him etc.

Live together, don't live together, date him, marry him, we don't care. This isn't Trisha. Let's please stick to immigration issues.

Post by **John** » Thu Jul 05, 2007 9:52 am

Please folks, no more comments about English language ability! Off-topic!

Honey123, when you have found out more about his status, please do post. Until you do post there is nothing that can be done to advise you further.

brownbonno · Post by **brownbonno** » Thu Jul 05, 2007 10:13 am

John,thanks for the intervention.Such antagonistic approach to deficiency drive people underground,its very typical of our modern day society.

honey123 · Post by **honey123** » Fri Jul 06, 2007 11:16 am

Ok, thats top.
Ok well considering his assylum has been declined and also his appeal was rejected isit possible for him to to reopen a "fresh case." (it was a year and half ago that he applied and was rejected anyway)

Marco 72 · Post by **Marco 72** » Fri Jul 06, 2007 11:22 am

On what grounds did he apply for asylum?

Jeff Albright · Post by **Jeff Albright** » Fri Jul 06, 2007 4:33 pm

honey123 wrote:Ok, thats top.
Ok well considering his assylum has been declined and also his appeal was rejected isit possible for him to to reopen a "fresh case." (it was a year and half ago that he applied and was rejected anyway)

Of course it is possible but is it sensible and worth the effort?
He can submit a fresh asylum claim or he can submit a human rights claim basing on the fact that his removal would breach his right for private and family life he has formed with you.
However, the chances to success are very slim indeed unless he can show that there will be significant threat to his life if he returned to the country of his nationality and there are truly exceptional reasons for him to be granted leave overriding immigration control. The latter has extremely high threshold.

pmorrison · Post by **pmorrison** » Fri Jul 06, 2007 4:48 pm

Girl,
Are you sure you are ready for marriage at your age. Also don't you want a guy who is able to support you. What if you have kids. I would think carefully about what you are doing. As an Albanian I am sure he is a very nice guy, however are you sure you aren't just blinded by love in this instance.
If you are sure its a case of 'What you want' and not just what your boyfriend wants, (maybe he is pressuring you into marriage to get the visa)
Suggest you keep a close eye on him, who does he call, does he flirt in public with other women etc etc
I found the right person to marry after only a short while of looking and she was from Vietnam. I had to be careful she wasn't just someone looking for a passport and a free ride. I'm lucky I found the right person, good luck to you.

brownbonno · Post by **brownbonno** » Fri Jul 06, 2007 6:02 pm

pmorrison wrote:Girl,
Are you sure you are ready for marriage at your age. Also don't you want a guy who is able to support you. What if you have kids. I would think carefully about what you are doing. As an Albanian I am sure he is a very nice guy, however are you sure you aren't just blinded by love in this instance.
If you are sure its a case of 'What you want' and not just what your boyfriend wants, (maybe he is pressuring you into marriage to get the visa)
Suggest you keep a close eye on him, who does he call, does he flirt in public with other women etc etc
I found the right person to marry after only a short while of looking and she was from Vietnam. I had to be careful she wasn't just someone looking for a passport and a free ride. I'm lucky I found the right person, good luck to you.

Its a pity that the young girl find herself in this situation.Yes,the forum should be able to point her to the right direction.I am sure we can only comment of the immigration issue.Regarding the ''Love'' she better see a counsellor.If the man in the picture is a non British and at the same time an asylum seeker doesn't translate the relationship to be ''visa for love or love for visa''.People should try and drift away from creating phobics in our society.This is a 17 years old girl,cannot discuss her concerns with the parents,but feel safer to come to a forum like this to seek advise.Yet,there is no welcoming advise.Remember we have got enough teenage in the UK.

honey123 · Post by **honey123** » Sat Jul 07, 2007 1:10 pm

your all being really helpfull and lovely honestly but let me tell you something. i come from an arab background and have always said as a child untill now that id like to return to the meditrainian or somewhere different and settle there for life. my family have always encouraged me on this aswell. my bf also does not want to settle in the country, the truth of the matter is that he just wants to be able to settle here short termly and stablise himself to show my family that he can support me before they let me just "go" off with a "stranger." my family are unaware of the relationship and in my cultre he is supposed to come to ask for my hand before having any communication with me and after that the decision would be mine after sevral "public" meetings with him. however in this day and age things went the other way and the fact is i have been dating him for two years now and will be turning eighteen soon. were both fed up of "sneaking" around and to be honest i just want to settle down myself and have a family of my own. i dont believe im young at all because i have many commitments and personal responsiblilites as it is. anyhow im not sure what his asylum claim was based on. furthermore he we went on friday and they just told him to come back! extremly frustrating!

honey123 · Post by **honey123** » Fri Jul 13, 2007 11:08 am

ive ended the relationship
so this subject can now be closed.

Post by **John** » Fri Jul 13, 2007 11:12 am

Honey123, noted ..... and I have to say that at your age that is a sensible decision, at least not to progress to marriage at such a young age. But if the relationship has totally ended, so be it.

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marriage ....:(

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