Retaining US greencard -- some complex questions

[plutoLPR]

Hi guys, I have been very worried about retaining LPR since my latest interaction at the border. Found plenty of basic information online but so far it is quite generic -- not a lot to differentiate between what could happen and what actually does happen most of the time -- and sometimes a little scaremongering, so just hoping an expert here could help me out with advice on the below.

Background:
-I am a US LPR (for over 10 years) living and working outside the US for the past 3 years and with the intention of continuing this pattern for another 2-3 years before returning to the US.
-The underlying reasons for being outside the US is to manage my own business activities outside the US (I am a freelance consultant and occasionally take on employment directly too), and to live with my wife, who I met outside the US and is awaiting her US greencard (should come through within 2 years).
-I am familiar with the overall residence requirements and, as far as I know, have already done all I can to demonstrate that I have not abandoned residence: have registered for selective service, file my taxes, maintain a US address (my parents' home), a US bank account etc. My entire nuclear family (father, mother, siblings) live in the US. I do argue at the border whenever I return that all my ties are to the US and I have no substantial ties outside the US.
-I also enter the US at least once every six months and state that my ultimate destination is my home in the US.
-So far, this has worked fine. I rarely got asked anything and never ended up in secondary questioning, though sometimes they wrote "out 6 months" in my passport or verbally advised a re-entry permit.

Current situation:
-On my most recent entry, the CBP agent was a little more assertive and tried to claim that I wasn't living in the US. She wrote "advised I130" by the entry stamp.
-What worried me most was that the agent seemed to know that I only visited the US for a few days every 6 months over at least the past year (I guess they finally joined up the airline departures manifest IT system to their entry records).
-I am now worried that, if CBP has a true view of how little time I spend in the US, simply keeping this up could put my LPR at risk, but I am very unclear on how large that risk is and what I could/should do to mitigate it.

Questions:

1. I am considering getting a re-entry permit to at least push this problem out by 2 years. Is there any downside to applying for a re-entry permit? (I know the costs and travel procedure involved and that is not a problem.) E.g. does it cause any greater scrutiny of my absences, either now, or after the permit expires (assuming I go back to my current pattern after expiry if I still need to live outside the US).

2. There is a lot of talk about being issued a notice to appear and brought before an immigration judge. Can anyone help me understand how real this risk is? Given far greater problems with immigration, would a border CBP agent really haul a polite, self-sufficient, law-abiding LPR who says all the right things, before an immigration court, and then pay a government lawyer to argue for abandonment, which is a high hurdle? I know it can be done -- I am just wondering whether this is a one in ten risk or more like one in ten thousand for people like me. (I reason that there must be millions of LPRs in a situation similar to my own, i.e. intending to live permanently in the US but who don’t presently spend most of their time in the US.) Similarly, does anyone ever really get "deferred inspection"?

3. I have a second passport in a differently spelled name. Could I just use this passport to exit the US, and therefore deny DHS knowledge of my actual departure dates? Aside from the airline manifests, is there any other way for them to know? This could solve my immediate problem, i.e. avoid scrutiny since they would have no quick snapshot of my presence/absence.

4. Is there anything else I can do to deny DHS knowledge of my movements? I have heard that driving out of the country doesn't register at all?

5. Does being removed (i.e. if you lose the case before an immigration judge) prejudice future visits (ESTA) to the US or a future greencard application (my family are all in the US so I could just re-apply?). If so, if I ever get a Notice to Appear, could I just surrender my greencard and leave without prejudicing future visits or applications?

6. If I file a FOIA request for my entry and exit date history, does DHS have to comply with the request, and how long should I expect it to take? (This will tell me whether they actually know by exit dates.)

Really appreciate any advice that people can offer.

Thanks
Pluto